When I was pregnant, every now and then, I'd have a moment of thought where I'd worry that I'd be disappointed if I had a boy. I've never told anyone this, and so, I hope you won't judge me for confessing those thoughts. Disappointed because so often, when people have a boy and then a girl, or a girl and then a boy, you hear people say, "Oh, now you have the PERFECT family, one of each." I felt those comments to heart every time I'd hear them, because while I was never sure what I was having when I was pregnant, I felt more boy thoughts than girl, even telling Shane at one point that I thought we'd have a girl later, just not yet.
I feel silly confessing that, because when Tommy was born, and I looked between his legs, I felt... joy, elation, thrilled, everything but disappointment. The second he was out, my family became even more perfect than it already was, because I am now lucky to have not one, but TWO boys. I still remember how my voice shook with happiness and emotion as I called up to Shane, "It's a boy!" Would I like a girl someday? Sure, of course, I'd love to dress someone in pink, but if all I ever have in my life is blue? I'll still count my lucky stars every single night.
I'm finding, though, that not everyone sees it like that. When I'm out with Luke and Tommy and people ask if Tommy is a boy or a girl, sometimes they aren't kind. Sometimes they say things like, "Oh, too bad you didn't get a girl," or "No girl yet, huh?" When I'm out with just Tommy and they ask if he's my first, and I say I have an older son, sometimes I hear, "Oh, I bet you wanted a girl this time!"
No, actually, what I wanted was a healthy baby, AND I GOT HIM.
There is nothing more perfect than that.
Photo by Beth, of course